What is that? Guy hormones?

Declaimer: My respect and apologies to the good men around. Good men who literally warm my heart. And by good men I mean, after this article if you are not a little guilty. Kudos! you can walk with your head up, chest out! (You don’t have to walk like that if you don’t want to though, just know you have my respects :))

And these are my perspectives. I ain’t taking any controversies, so don’t even try?

I may not be completely true in saying this, but it is, at least for me, that a man’s personality is pretty much in how he deals with other women. I’m a naive and a feminist, so as far I have lived, I have only known men to cheat.

So yes? Why do men cheat? Even men who are in stable and comfortable relationships?

It’s because men have that natural instinct to stray. He contemplates cheating because there’s not enough happiness in his life, he contemplates cheating if his ego is bruised, he contemplates cheating if he sees a chance, he contemplates cheating because the earth is round and so is the sun?, he does that because the river flows downstream and so does his dignity? And oh the apple fell down on Newton and so he discovered the laws of gravity, how much they ought to cheat now? And wait, there are 26 alphabets in the English language and x is closely placed before y. Oh boy! Now they have Every. Reason to. Cheat! Don’t they?

Or did they say, they were drunk so they cheated? It is as lame as the 26 English alphabets excuse. Being drunk isn’t an excuse for lying, cheating, or murder. Even though the alcohol affected his brain, he still did what he did, so drinking is no excuse for infidelity. He cheats because he does that. He does that because he just does that.

Men have 10 times more testosterone than women, they say. But what the heck? If you cannot get hold of your own hormones then is there anything you can get hold of? They don’t even need a woman to be attractive or fully-grown so to say, to hit on. It’s just the guy hormone or whatever that is. Cheating isn’t nature’s fault. It’s his.

When a man makes a vow of monogamy to a spouse or significant other, and then breaks that vow, he is in violation of a relationship contract. It’s hard to continue a relationship after someone cheats. We all know that. We all know that it is a dishonest and hurtful thing to do to a person with whom you are in a relationship. I personally have always preached and practiced “If you want to see someone else, you should just break up with the person you are dating”. But I did get it? :)

In their effort of meeting their own less than emphatic sexual agenda, they undermine their personal integrity. A cheater but never gets what he wants—a clean getaway—because infidelity is nearly always discovered eventually, and when that happens it inevitably comes with devastatingly painful consequences. No matter what position you hold in the society or how much you earn, what car you drive or how branded your attires are. No matter how much of a social activist you are, once you cheat. Bam! You are labeled. And that’s the lowest level you can stoop to.  

Can’t you please be faithful and committed to your wife or your lover? Go home, you wife is waiting for you. Go home, your daughter looks up to you. Go home, before you put your precious relationships at stake for nothing really. Go home, before you lose those honors. Go home?

Does a modern technology make life more convenient or was life better when technology was simpler?

N.B.: Another essay (on a given topic) I wrote as a Third Year student for an Intra-college Essay Writing Competition in 2011. This one fetched me the First Prize too :)

Philosophical debates have arisen over the present and future use of technology in society, with disagreements over whether technology improves the human condition or worsens it.

Technology is the discipline dealing with the art or science of applying scientific knowledge to practical problems. Nowadays, when the rapidness of development and research is so impressive, we are close on an era where technology is limited only by our imagination. It is the modern technology that makes life easier and more dignified.

The use of technology began with the conversion of natural resources into simple tools. With the prehistoric discovery of fire came the invention of wheel, creation of boats and vehicles, building homes and so on.

Old technology is constantly being phased out by new inventions. For example: Computer technology provides us with faster news updates than the news papers. Unlike typewriters, computers have a wide rage of options to save, edit, copy, paste, etc… Internet have lessened physical barriers to communication and allowed humans to interact liberally on a global scale.

The technology available today has made the wealth of knowledge available to students, which offers great potential for the speed and style of learning. Information is presented in so many ways that any type of learner, whether gifted or disabled, can find and use the necessary material. Education is no longer the elitist privilege it once was. The information on the Internet is there for all who have access, without discrimination (Hollowell July 28, 2010).

Paper checks have been replaced by ATM cards, check cards and credit cards which are comparatively convenient and quick. Bills can be paid online or over phone.

Cell phones today serve a multiple purpose ousting land lines, radios, cameras and the old letter-writing system. 3G phones can avail internet access and with GPS technology we can know our exact location which can guide us back home incase we are lost.

Though Bhutan doesn’t enjoy all the privileges of a well advanced country right away, with today’s pace of development it won’t be too far. Recently monks across the country attended a training program in dzongkha information skills. They will now be equipped with necessary computer skills that will enable them to participate on many fronts in society (Kuensel, March 9, 2011).

With technology advancement, the level of living standard increases. Robots and machines would take over our daily life chores saving our time and strength. It will just require pressing some buttons rather than doing the hard labor ourselves. A more developed world with greater technologies will definitely be more convenient.

Unemployment in Bhutan

N.B.: This is my first prize winning essay, I wrote in 2008 as a First Year student at CST :)

     The development progress in any country depends on the productive output from its population and its ability to provide gainful employment to a large segment of youth. As stated in unemployment-Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia, (2008), “Unemployment is a state in which a person is without work, available to work and is currently seeking for work”. Today, unemployment is seen as a rising concern all over the world especially in the south Asian countries. Like in all other countries, the development progress in Bhutan was followed with the unemployment problems arising among the youths, aged under 20 years. The development in Bhutan ushered the kingdom into an era of one of the biggest economic challenges wherein more than 40% of the population is facing tremendous difficulty in finding their choice of employment. Though, Bhutan has a lower rate of unemployment among these countries, yet the number is very alarming taking into consideration its population size.

     The employment scenario in Bhutan has undergone major changes particularly over the last decade. This is seen as an outcome of considerably faster growth rates in the secondary and tertiary sectors compared to the primary sectors. According to the Bhutan living standard survey Report, (2007), the unemployment rate has increased to 3.7% in 2007 from 2.5% in 2004 and 3.2% in 2006 (p. 40). In Lhuentse, Tashiyangtse and Thimphu, unemployment rates are found to be the highest. The high unemployment rate in Lhuentse and Trashiyangtse is because the job seekers increasingly outnumber the job opportunities available (since these dzongkhags are the rural parts).The population is high but the development rate very low,  the facilities such as industries and co operations, which employ many people are comparatively very few in these regions of the country. Thus the few available co operations remain helplessly short of space to accommodate the needy . (Though the government is now emphasizing on rural development).

Similarly, the unemployment rate in Thimphu is very high. This maybe because, Thimphu being much urbanized as compared to other dzongkhags attracts most of the Bhutanese jobseekers. But here, the people either do not want to do the jobs available or they are not qualified for the same. These mismatches between the jobs and the jobseekers leave the post empty and people idle. Usually the unsuccessful candidates do not return to their villages but remain back in Thimphu thereby increasing the unemployment rate in Thimphu.

     The incidence of unemployment is highest among the youth aged 15-24, most being early school dropouts. The scenario of the unemployment situation we see is just a tip of the ice berg. And we know that this trend will only mount. The semi literate job seeking population will be far larger. It appears that the training institutes will continue to be a weak link between the swelling student population and a hungry job market.

The Frey the problems of unemployment, a distant and vague concern in the past, suddenly appear to be at our doorstep. At the same time, we suffer an acute shortage of manpower in nearly every sector, both government and private. The irony of unemployed or potentially unemployed youth and a simultaneous manpower shortage spells a serious short coming in planning and coordination. More so because, it hits us at a time when we did not expect unemployment to even be an issue for at least another decade.

        Earlier when people left schools, they went to work on land, but today people seem more eager to find lucrative jobs in urban places. Moreover the lack of understanding on dignity of labor by Bhutanese youth has added up to the increasing number of unemployment. This is a reason as to why the country has employed thousands of Indian workers for blue collar job, building and road construction works because the Bhutanese either cannot-or-won’t do it. According to the former minister, Mr. Yeshey Zimba, “For a small country the question of migrant workers is always a very serious matter”. The cheap labour is fueling Bhutan’s rapid modernization. But the influx of foreign workers, mixed with rising unemployment among Bhutan’s youth is blamed for increasing petty crime and drug and alcohol abuse. The kingdom today finds itself in the position of not having enough laborers on one hand, while having too many over-qualified people on the other. This means that we have on one hand, thousands of students dropping out of school, completing school, and graduating from tertiary institutions every year with more and more of them unable to find jobs; on the other, we have many government and private organizations in urgent need of manpower, especially skilled workers, and not being able to find them. The unemployed youth thus remain confused and confronted by a critical career situation.

      Enormous success of enrolment in schools and increased output of educated youths has resulted in increasing numbers of youths entering the job market. However, the private sector being underdeveloped is unable to absorb the mass. Problem arising out of the mismatch between requirements of the organizations and the skills of the labor force is the reason as to why the scenario in Bhutan is termed as Structural Unemployment.

As the problem comes into focus, what we see is the need for something in between, a range of training programmes to prepare youth for the job market. What we need are training centres and institutions at all levels, offering courses in the most urgently required fields. Skills development has long been recognized in Bhutan as an urgent requirement.

  

     The situation in Bhutan is not that serious as compared to other developing countries. And the truth remains that  However the need to create new employment opportunities in the country has become particularly urgent. As stated by the planning commission of Bhutan, (2006), “unemployment, a phenomenon unknown to the country recently, will soon be a reality that the country will be forced to grapple it” (p.37).

     The government has already started working over the issue. High priority is given to the development of private sector through establishments of handicrafts and other small scale industries. Construction industries and service industries are also being promoted. Further, the government also established the Ministry of Labor and Human Settlement in 2003 to deal with issues related to youth unemployment.  

      In addition to the creation of additional employment through accelerated growth and development of private sector, it is important to create opportunities which will make rural life and employment attractive to youths. The problems of unemployment must be tackled soon in order to increase the productivity of the country and to alleviate poverty.

We live in a changing world full of opportunities.

                                            

Reference Lists

1. National Statistics Bureau. (2007). Employment. Bhutan Living Standard Survey Report. 39-45

2. Department of Aid and Debt Management. (2006). Private sector development and youth employment. Ninth round table meeting Report.   16-21

3. Planning commission. (2006). Employment. Ninth plan main document. 37-39

4. Unemployment-wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. (2008). Unemployment. Retrieved March 24, 2008, from http://en.wikipedid.org/wiki/unemployment

5. Lawson, A. (2002). Bhutan’s deepening unemployment crises, Retrieved March 24, 2008, from http://news bbc.co.uk/l/hi/world/south-Asia/2050395.stm

6. Prakash, D. (2006). Unemployment rising as economy grows, Retrieved March 26, 2008, from http://www.asianews.it/index.php?=l=en&art=5489

                            

Am I doomed?

Or is this life?

But what is it if it doesn’t make us feel good? Do we still hang in there? Do we still hope for things to change? Do we still keep believing what was once broken can be mended to its original? Or is it okay to have the scars as long as it gets back in shape?

But again what if we don’t give a chance? Will we regret it? Or will we not? How do we know if it’s worth a chance? Why is trusting people so easy yet so hard?

I don’t know where I’m headed? Why can’t I figure out my life? Why can’t I be sure of what I want in life? Why does growing up have to be so hard for me? Why does my heart have to ache? Why do I have to get attached so soon? Why oh why?

Of all the questions tumbling down my head, I have answer for just one, an answer which sounds rather confusing than the question in itself: Why am I so confused? Because I cannot foresee things. I cannot say if the decision I make today is good or bad for me. I live in the moment. I do things that please me at this juncture. I’m not far sighted. And I’m super superstitious. One reason I’m skeptical about seeing astrologers, What if he asks me to leave certain things I love?

Time has given me experiences and taught me lessons and made me braver. Last year was one hell of a long long year. Too many first-times, I felt like I lived a decade in a year and wrinkled (Just kidding, no wrinkles visible yet *wink wink*). Anyway, people who I thought would always be with me didn’t make it through. Some aren’t even important to me anymore. Some other people took their place. And maybe they will be replaced too someday. But meanwhile, I learned to be independent, not only because it hurts when you get a ‘no’ for an answer but also because it feels great to do things on your own and even better when you accomplish them.

I believe there is god. Not the philosophical within-us-god. But a god who is invisible to us, but is always there to guide us, an invisible something who only want the good for us. I have relied on my mother for every little decision making till now. I started believing more in moms-make-the-best-decision after an incident at college. 

When I was in first year, I had gone out to the hostel courtyard to get a practical paper from a friend. The night had fallen. There was a little drizzle. As I was returning, the lights went out, scared of the dark I ran back not realizing there were glass cylinders on the way. Which I later learned were kept by the final years to measure the rainfall as a part of their Project Work. Well, I bumped in to one of them and it shattered into pieces, the sound of which echoed from the walls of the adjacent hostel building. It was just over a month that I had joined college, so seniors were still dreaded by us. On reaching my room, I phoned my mommy and told her what had happened. I also told her I wanted to keep it to myself, that no body saw me so nobody would know. But she said, I should confess about it to my counsellor, apologize and pay for the broken cylinder. With heart in my mouth, I knocked on her door and with a sorry face spoke out exactly what I had rehearsed with my mom. The counsellor was very kind, she didn’t scold me nor did she make me pay for the cylinder. 

Now when it’s reiterating the story, it is silly but it was a terrifying one then. From that day on, my mom be my decision maker, even when it was related to assignments and subjects I was studying. She had no idea of some of the decisions I made her make. When it was really tough, I used to ask her to just pick one. And call it luck but her decisions always favored me. Maybe she is my god in disguise.

But now there are decisions just I should make. Maybe I should make her pick A or B. But maybe there is no A and B, maybe I should formulate that first. It is going to cost me if she picks wrong though. Haha.

Bleh! Forget it. What is bound to happen will happen.

Half of me says: Life goes on, Confused or not we end up in the same grave. The other half says: It is not just where we end up after dead; it is about how we are living while we are doing that. 

This confused mind.

How rude can people be?

How rude can people be?

Why are some people so rude? Why can’t they be polite? Does it cost them anything to be polite? Why can’t they talk back to us the way we talk to them? Why be so rude? (Now read it again, almost screaming!)

Well I know this is nothing compared to how people are suffering across the world, how they have nothing to eat or wear, how some get exploited, how many put up with racial torments, how some are sick and in pain, how the terrorist attacks kill thousands of innocents and how the terrorist’s family get the government or whosoever’s fury in the name of revenge. I’m very much aware there is greater insolence happening around, I feel small and guilty and I feel like I’m complaining for such a small issue, but right now all I can do is care for this little heart which has literally drowned in this huge emotional catastrophe.

While I have encountered impoliteness all along my career path (also the time I realized how much growing up sucks) and I have endured them, though not boldly but I did walk out of them, and walked out clean. This one is regarding an encounter with the Thimphu City Lag Thram Distributing Officer, I don’t know if this is her actual designation but she was an officer distributing Lag Thrams and working for the Thimphu city, so.

So today, I was calling her up just to enquire on an official work, and her speech had me awestruck in a bad goddamned way. Why be so rude? And hang up? As far as I’m aware I was polite and not irrational because I had just uttered half a sentence. So I’m pretty sure I did not annoy her. Her rudeness literally murdered my spirit for today. How can she talk so rude to people she doesn’t even know? And this is official okay? I wasn’t begging her any favors. Why did she act like she feed and clothe me, so I owe her a big deal?

And since I have already started, let me also add this one here so that I don’t have to be cranky about this in another article. It was last month on the 17^th when I finally got to appear for the driving test. And well I was driving a Xcent, because I was confident driving it since I had practiced the box with it. I was third in the endless queue, and already anxious and shivering. Like anyone else I didn’t like failing, I had to get through this one by all means because my Learner’s License was already 3 years old+ and I, 25+, so I needed at least a driving license if not anything else. Besides how long could I be a fraud driving with my sister’s license? While I was fighting my fears, this ugly RSTA official (ugly because he was rude) calls out to me saying “Are you going to appear the test with this car? Don’t even attempt, you are FAILING!” Yes, these were his actual words. I was already panicky, I didn’t need any negative vibes. So I confronted him for his filthy words to which he said he only meant good for me. Well Mister there is a good way of saying the car is quite big for the test, right? Why be so rude?

Later a fight broke out between the ugly guy and another test-taker, so you see it wasn’t just me who found the ugly guy ugly. Anyway, I passed the test.

After all these years I have realized being the victim of rudeness isn’t my fault, I’m pretty adorable so little can I do to annoy someone. Haha. Jokes, Jokes.  I understand people aren’t rude because I say something unpleasant to them. They are just rude. They are sick. Born that way, something like that. People who have the audacity to be rude pollute the good population and bring down the name of the organization they are working for.

Not much of an issue, I know. But my heart ached, okay? So there, I spoke my heart out.

Good day!

A list of “I should be doings”

Call it my New Year resolution carp or whatever but there are things I should have done and things I should have been doing long before. Never mind though, better late than never ;) Here on I'mma comply myself strictly to the followings:

1.  Spend less time with my phone ~ The most beautiful thing you can gift yourself after a fall is to pick yourself up, dust off, move on! I was only moving on and duh! it almost cost me my precious eyes. I used to play Candy Crush like a maniac. Competition was what kept me going, if my friends were a level ahead of me, I had to beat them. Play whole day, whole night I don’t care, just beat them! If only I had these same spirits and passion with my studies, I could have done wonders. No kidding. Anyway after a month of passionate candy crush-ing, I realized my vision was getting poorer, I went for an eye check up only to learn my eye glasses’ power has increased tremendously, and only I am to be blamed for my carelessness.

Anyway, I did not learn anything from it. I am never going to learn, am I? :( On an average I think I use my phone 16 hours a day, the rest 8 hours I’m sleeping. I should really, really, really, R-E-A-L-L-Y stop spending so much of my time fiddling with my cell phone.

2.   Learn something Engineering ~ Engineering was never my thing, not my cup of tea, never wanted to be one. But a twist in the plot, and Ta-da! Here I am with a Bachelors in Civil Engineering and 3 years+ working experience. I do not want to defame myself but honestly I’m still not very confident with the designs and drawings I do. Too bad if anyone was planning to pay me to draw for them. I do the drawings pretty well though. Please ignore whatever I blurted out earlier. Haha.

On a serious note, I’m trying to learn, learn from the seniors, learn through everyday office works and learn from the books and internet. I feel I didn’t do enough while in the College, all I remember of college is rushing to get the latest movies, watching the soaps till dawn, crying so well throughout the Korean dramas, sleeping and being hungry all the time! I would do anything if I could go back to college and start over with the basics again. But less were we concerned about it then, all we wanted was to get through the exams and be done with college already. Kids really! Phew!

But I know I have to do justice to my degree certificate and 4 years of serious torment. I believe there are still stairways to learning, maybe I can do better with a master’s degree ;)

3.    Read more.

4.    Compared to others’ blogs, mine is a child’s play. Improve my writing skills!

5.   Be consistent with my healthy diets and exercises ~ Workout for the body I always wished for and maintain it :P I actually should be average skinny by the amount I eat, I don’t know why I’m fat, fat, fat. x-(

6.    For goodness’ sake, START SAVING ~ I should really stop buying everything I fancy and blowing up money as if I’m some millionaire. Do I still dream someday I would wake up to being a billionaire? 3 years into job, and I faint every time I check my account balance. Okay that was a little too exaggerated but I seriously need to start saving.

7.   Get more adventurous outdoor ~ I’m gonna make 2016 my year for many adventures and outdoor activities. I think I have had enough of sleeping all day or watching movies all night or doing nothing at all during the weekends or all other sorts of boring nothing-to-dos. So now, before I reach the age where I would get short of breathes after taking a few steps, I wish to go on trekkings and campings and visiting many lhakhangs and making 2016 an extra active year. Maybe I should buy a bike?

8.    Be Kind. Be a better person ~ in every aspect.

9.    Take a driving test and get a license before I get caught. Brrr!

10. Get creative, revive the old me ~ Darn! I remember being very creative when I was young. I could do a lot of things, things that amuse me now as I look back. I could sketch and paint with water colors, I could knit and crochet, I could weave plastic baskets embedding all sorts of deigns, I could make roses, hair bands, hair clips and brooches out of small pieces of clothes; I used to sew cute clothes for Barbie dolls. I guess I lost all my skills as I grew up, maybe I got so busy growing up and settling down I forgot those little pleasures that kept me engaged throughout my childhood. I shall get back with these, maybe even do an article on these DIY stuffs.

11.  I need to get braver ~ I have always been a chicken. I’m scared of almost everything. Forget watching horror movies, I can’t even go to pee on my own after hearing any creepy story. I’m scared of crossing the roads, friends say maybe I was hit by a car and got killed in my last generation. I’m also scared of opening the door to people when I’m home alone, I fear they would take out some sword from mid-air and chop chop me. This one is really lame but I jump to the other side of the lane when I see any random weird looking guy. If I smell anything like gas or fire, and for that I have a dog nose, I’m already running. I think my instincts are very sharp; I react very fast and panic very well.

But it’s also true that we don’t possibly know what we are capable of until we have to do it. Until just a month ago, I couldn’t even sleep alone in my own room, but circumstances! and I had to live alone in the whole flat for 5 days and 6 nights! First night, I chanted prayers and sang myself to sleep. The rest of the days went pretty well. I’m glad I faced it and survived.

Maybe I’m growing up a little slower than the rest but I know I’m growing, and getting bolder and braver with time. I will grow and fight my fears. Here’s to a braver year ahead!

12. Finally, on a more personal note, I need to learn not to get attached to people too soon, not be very sensitive and emotional about every little thing (but this runs in the blood, so unless I drain out all of it, I don’t think I m getting away with this).

Merry Christmas and Happy new year folks!

Thanks to some shit heads, I did not have a good night’s sleep

When you wake up in the middle of the night to some screeching women, you know you are sleeping at Olakha.

I used to love this place, loved the drive through the expressway everyday to and back from the office, if not anything else. Until some crappy drunkards have made it hard for me to even get some decent 7 hours sleep. Every other day, I have to jerk in my sleep to some insensitive drunkards screaming their hearts out on the roads and those, those are mostly women. Shame! Shame!

After a fighting neighbor, I insisted we shift to some decent place. Sure we shifted to a bigger apartment, 3bhk, good house owner, good neighbor, but at Olakha itself. My sister had suggested we shift to Motithang, but I, being a new driver wasn’t very confident about the road at Motithang, and I somehow felt attached to this place.

But the nuisance is everywhere in this area. Those pathetic, insensitive, miserable drunkards have made it almost impossible for even a single night’s peaceful sleep. Surprisingly, they aren’t even people living around here, because after their freaking dramas, they drive back in some roaring cars, which rather sound like some planes taking off.

Last night, it was 3:30 am when I jerked to some grown up women’s almost ear piercing shouts. I so wanted to ring up 113, but I felt the police deserved some sleep too and honestly I’m scared of the police, and I don’t know why.

Of course, there are times when we stay out late too, there are some late night dinner catch ups or occasional clubbing, but we tiptoe back to our place, decent enough not to disturb others.  But no, these other people, they wanna make some grand entry; they won’t leave until they wake up every sleeping soul. And the most common line they scream is, “NO! I’M NOT DRUNK!” I wanna go “Bravo!” and throw boulders at their shitty heads.

Enough of curse words for a day for a lady. Haha.

Good day Fellas!